Why There Really ARE Coincidences
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People love to say "there are no coincidences," that somehow the universe occasionally smiles benevolently and nudges a few molecules around, JUST FOR US, so we can experience the sense of connection between two otherwise unconnected events. It's a not too subtle wish to be distinguished by the apparently uncaring void, to be the witness to a marvelous and largely invisible *network* of significance that makes all the existential angst go away, if only for a moment.
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People love to say "there are no coincidences," that somehow the universe occasionally smiles benevolently and nudges a few molecules around, JUST FOR US, so we can experience the sense of connection between two otherwise unconnected events. It's a not too subtle wish to be distinguished by the apparently uncaring void, to be the witness to a marvelous and largely invisible *network* of significance that makes all the existential angst go away, if only for a moment.
Sorry. I think that's a
bunch of hooey. You want to know the marvelous mysterious connection
between those two random events you just experienced? It's YOU. One
thing happened, and you noticed. That gets its own little spot in your
brain, a memory location with a set of tags for when, where, what, why,
and what it all means, generally not very much. A bit later, another
thing happens. Your brain builds this new thing a spot too, makes connections for it, gives it its own tag. You, the boss, the runner of the software,
then make a discovery: these two experiences, these two events, these
two *memories* HAVE A MATCHING TAG! It's COSMIC! These two *totally*
unrelated things actually have a secret significant link that reveals
the intention of some higher or other power. And you, of all the
billions who have lived and are living, you got to be there when the
link appeared. How great is that?
Not
great, and not that amazing, maybe not amazing at all. Especially once
you realized, recognize, *admit*, that *you* stuck those matching tags on these two events. You are the signifier, the creator of the magical
link. The only actual connection between these two events is that you
noticed them, that traces of each of them ended up in your brain, ripe
for pattern matching.
Don't break
your arm patting yourself on the back. You did what humans have done for
millenia. You saw two things happen, you selected features about them
both that seem similar and you assigned significance to that similarity.
Aren't you smart? Then, not so smart, you immediately ignored the fact
that you did that, and by forgetting, you added a whole other layer of
significance--this *happened*, this connection, there *must* be a
reason, it *must* be a message, a sign of my importance, a sign that the
universe loves me after all.
Nope. The only significance is what you wrote into, right before you read it back out. That's how clever you are.